It was one happy day. All we did was laugh, bully one another in a sweet way and share fun throwback stories. When I arrived home that night after a tiring yet fun day with them, I have realized that it doesn’t matter how many people who have left and chose a life without me. And that I should be thankful instead and treasure the ones who didn’t give up on me and chose to stay.
I used to be lonely whenever a friend betrays me. I would always embrace self-pity and bitterness. I remember how that sad feeling used to haunt me for days, weeks, months and even years. It was horrible and annoying at the same time. The pain was even hard to explain. It was more hurtful than the pain from a breakup with a lover. It was more like a separation anxiety. The feeling of losing someone – forever. It’s forever because first, I don’t believe in second chances and second, I’m not the type of person who apologizes and asks for forgiveness, especially for something I didn’t do, or something I’ve no clue at all. You know, ghosters, these are the people who just disappeared in your life leaving you clueless and guilty of nothing. And I tell you, they don’t worth any second of your time.
As someone who is so curious about human behaviour and who loves reading people’s mind, I think there’s really a tendency that somehow, along the road of this kind of journey I chose, I would let myself hurt, by being too involved with the people whom I met and – it’s true. I have always been a great listener, your mighty shock absorber. I could listen and talk with a friend for as long as she/he pleases. I have always been the very first person who gets to be genuinely happy whenever a friend accomplishes something because hey a true friend is not only there on your bad times but on your good times, too. And doesn’t it make you feel proud having successful circle of friends than keeping those who have a so effed up life?
I have always been so at ease with someone whom I called a ‘friend’ that sometimes I forgot that we cannot trust all people. Yes, it’s sad but true, there are people who you think are your friends because they are there for you when you need a shoulder to cry on but they disappear when you’re at the peak of recovering or of your success. Guess, why? Simple. Because some people choose to live a life filled with negativity, of jealousy, hatred and insecurities. They feel happy when someone suffers. That’s why this kind of ‘friend’ is only there for you on your sad and shallow fun times. The reason why I only choose to share all the good things that are happening to me to a few trusted friends only.
I won’t blame a ‘friend’ if he/she gets resentful because I kept a secret from him/her but on the other hand, she shouldn’t also blame me for not trusting him/her enough especially if I sense that there’s a hint of negativity in the way he/she responds to me. I’m saying this because some people think that all people are the same, that all people talk without thinking because I do. My brain actually never stops. The things I usually share have been well organized at the back of my mind. The details depend on the type of person whom I’m speaking with. For example, if I sense that she/he loves all the negativity in the world then I would share everything negative to him/her. I would feed his/her green monsters until they get fat and explode. Yep, that’s how supportive at the same time evil I can be and that’s how I evolved, maybe. I guess it’s true that you get wiser when you get older. I have learned that it’s easier to appreciate all the goodness in life without this kind of people.
So, if you have a friend who only knows how to suck all the goodness out of your life, get rid of them, right away. Don’t feel betrayed when they choose to cut you out their life. Think of it as the sweetest favor they did for you. Yep, because it is an effortless way of eliminating negative people in your life, while treasuring the ones who are there for you in good and hard times – and who love you unconditionally. 🙂
“Good times are a reminder and a reward for dealing with the difficult and challenging times we all go through. The trick is to celebrate the good times in advance of the difficult times. Always remember, good times await you after the difficult times pass….” ― James A. Murphy